Reality Aversion!

New Hollywood Fantaschtiscal

Budget: between £20 and £billion. Depending on how much change you possess on the night. And the generosity of friends.

Location: A Place where Time passes quickly.

Starring: Not You!

Featuring: A Cast of a Thousand Cigarettes!

Who: Don't sing or dance.

And: Are not there at the end of the night when you go home: Convinced You've Lost your Keys!

Credits: This film has no credit.

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The Critics Say:

Passed me by.

Promising.

More fun being savaged by a rabid pelican.

I raised one eyebrow.

Too much hair.

Once more unto die Brucke, Horatio.

Sordid!!

Thought-provoking.

Streched credulity like a rubber spider.

Don't ever darken my door again.

So good I lost my keys.

So what's wrong with happy endings all of a sudden?

Gave me a headache.

Lacked clarity.

I couldn't work out which audience the film was aimed at.

Reckon!!!!!!!

I understood less when I came out than I did before I went in.