wish I could be like…

For the second time this Autumn, my senior flight attendant is the redoubtable Christian, ensuring my comfort on a return flight from a city whose symbol is a bear standing on its hind legs.

Christian has the demeanour of a child thrust into the role of a teacher. He takes his job very seriously indeed. There’s a hint of the failed actor about him. His clipped tones elaborate in detail the delights of low-cost air travel, the opportunities it allows him and us to expand our minds and cast our hearts beyond the clouds.

Christian is everywhere. Offering advice, travel tips, manipulating easy-puppets, playing the accordion, mixing cocktails, blessing babies, levitating, establishing supra-national harmony.

He is the David Watts of European skies.